Here's your future

The odds are against me; I was late, I am about to present an incomplete assignment and my partner is nowhere to be seen. I’m literally screwed up in any imaginative way. Standing right in front of my manager, I was speechless for 5 minutes with my mind scrambling for a means to save myself but my brain works in a funny way because I ended up picturing yesterday match winner performance from Cristiano Ronaldo, giving me every reason not to dwell on the current situation. Then, turning in a dramatic fashion with a ferocious sense of heroism I said with a grin “Do you watch yesterday game?”

The lesson that I learned from the unfortunate incident is not to watch a football game on a Monday morning or not to eat nasi kandar for breakfast, lunch and dinner. In fact, I learned to know how my brain works! If I use my left brain more, I’m a mathematical genius which self explains me being stuck in an accounting profession, staying sober and dealing with people who think their fart smells better than yours. If I use my right brain more, I’m a deviant rock star who will has lots of money, sex, alcohol and more sex and dealing with people who sniff their own ass. I could not differentiate which side of my brain that I used more for Friendster is lame and Facebook is childish. Since I’m still sober and surrounded by pricks with calculators, I’m a left sided brainer for now though with the presence of alcohol, I do feel like a rock star.

On other note, it’s a brand new year. And as a customary to all new years, I have to make a plan and this year will be different from the past. I had concluded that it’s time for Fabien to grow up. I’m going to be 26 and things are not in equilibrium anymore with my belly catching up real fast. The real distinction as opposed to the past is the plan is a medium term, not a short term and has to be realistic, not to give me every reason to be drunk for unachieved targets. And the direction of my plan is purely influenced by wealth and not other things. If you disagreed, so be it.

I’m going to quit my job at the end of this year and leaving this country (I will miss Malaysian politics for sure). Possible destination would be Qatar, South Africa or Bermuda. Join an audit firm again as a stepping stone and look for an Investment Bank as an analyst. I can’t foresee myself being an auditor in my next life in fact I despised it, my motivation at work is declining fast. I don’t mind working long hours if it’s on something of my interest and audit is never being one not even close. Maybe it’s different in foreign soil, maybe the planning is better and clients are more efficient but my inner stubbornness gives a fucking no. I’m fed up of drafting financial statements, I’m fed up of GAMX and I’m fed up with the International Accounting Standards Boards. The firm needs to buck up in retaining personnel but count me out of it. I’m tired of saying the same thing again and again and again. For confidentiality, the facts remained undisclosed. If the people responsible for the “mess” insist on maintaining the status quo, so be it. It is rather annoying to me (my mind, heart, limbs and all) but I respect everybody’s right to their own opinion. Anyway moving back on being an analyst, I’m yet to start my beloved CFA. It’s frustrating because it’s still in a no-action-talk-only phase in which I had planned it a few years back. This is the year where the tables would turn or about to and my ambition would be granted by the Lord of You-Get-What-You-Ask and decided to postpone my CFA for another year and not spill a word on it hence a no-action-no-talk phase. Things come in little steps, realistic is the key. It’s hard to break into the industry without proper qualification but since I’m such a supreme confident-big ego lad, I would give it a try anyway. Alternatively I could do corporate listing, corporate restructuring or risk management and if I were to do any of these I do have a choice of staying in Malaysia, probably not.

My first property would finalize as early as mid of 2009, enough time for research and polishing my real estate investing skill. The real obstacle is getting a loan with minimal or no interest which left me with no option but to seek the King & the Queen of Support Land; my parents. I’m working hard on it, day and night I assured you. On the other hand, I’m yet to grasp with the dynamics of our equity market. It baffles me whenever I look at the share price and sweat on my investments which consistently stay below the break even level. Warren Buffet no longer appears in my dream, how sad. Seeing a pool of assets fast becoming a liability is a strenuous task and less not forgets I’m stress intolerant. A little bit more than my usual take will drive me nuts. Now, most of you already thought I’m crazy even I’m at my normal best, so to take up the craziness to a higher level leaves a prospect that our nation would not be happy to face. I can’t be bothered to imagine it.

I had decided against going out for drinks, reasons are simple. I need my liver and I need to reduce the digits in my motherfucking credit card statement and I may save myself from further embarrassment due to my drunken stupor. May the gargantuan hangover gone for good. But this is tough as my right brain needs alcohol. It’s interesting to see how I’m to progress in the next few weeks and it do makes me wonder if my decision proved costly because I rejected the chance to be an engineer for the sake of money and money does not seem to be enough in my line. Only time will tells when my name is listed in the upper echelon of Fortune top 100. Anyway, I think accountant or engineer is a lifeless bunch of people, no offence. I should do law, at least they make good money and the chances of getting laid are high.

For 5 days a week, I would be left writhing into a rotten cabbage. In fact, I was practically praying for the end of the day. Am I pathetic? I’m not sure but I feel like Homer except weekends of course.

Happy New Year!